Cleopatra

The Cleopatra-race discourse is hot just now, but, like most ancient historians, I have no energy for it. These arguments have been had, the evidence has been thoroughly gone over, and there’s no new ground to cover, so we might as well just have fun with the people who care way too much about one answer or another.

Land

The national dish is really thin bread with vegetables and processed milk on top.

North

The Venn diagram of “People who are into ancient Greece and Rome” and “Nazis” is also rather depressing to contemplate.

History

I’m only in it for the groupies, of course.

Catiline

I hope this email finds you in exile in Massilia.