Notify the chair of the subcommittee on sallies and rampages to begin a report on the feasibility of mustering at dawn for wrath and ruin.



Go not to the Elves for counsel, for you would not believe their hourly rates.



People are blaming Peter Jackson for the awful shoehorned romance triangle in the Hobbit films, but I suspect he’s not the one who’s really at fault. Jackson is a big kid playing make-believe.  That’s his genius and his weakness.  When he adds things to Tolkien, he tends to add things like collapsing staircases and troll-mounted catapults.  But an archer chick who has to choose between a rugged dark-haired hunk and a polished, sophisticated blond?  That sounds like something demanded by a studio marketing team with their eyes on the past couple years’ box office receipts.