If you haven’t heard of Roko’s basilisk, you can read a good write-up of it here. It’s an imaginary artificial intelligence that will torture anyone who didn’t help create it. While some people are scared of the basilisk, I’m more scared of the people who are so petty and angry at the world that they feel the need to project the same feelings into a hypothetical computer system. Reading about it is like listening in on a bunch of “men’s rights activists” on another evening of getting high and rewatching The Terminator because they don’t have dates.

So, if you were worried about the basilisk, don’t be. The unicorn is here to save you. My imaginary AI can kick their imaginary AI’s butt.