A (standing in front of mirror with a sheet of paper and a measuring tape): I have multiple advanced degrees! I aced my statistics course! I can between Celsius and Fahrenheit in my head! I can cite ancient philosophers by Bekker, Stephanus, and Diels-Kranz numbers! I can read papyrological and epigraphic texts published with the Leiden conventions… I can figure out my damned bra size!
B: Don’t ask me. The only thing I can measure in cups is tea.

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